Self-care Tips For Divorce

Develop a strong support group

Your life is going to change drastically; you’re going to feel alone. You need people you can call and talk to.  Vent to.  Get together with.  Go out with.  Give you advice, different perspectives. Offer support, a shoulder to cry on, etc.

Talk to a therapist

Some people view therapy as a taboo thing, or as a sign of weakness.  I assure you, you’ll wish you had started going sooner.  A therapist can give you a neutral, unbiased perspective, and help you see and realize things that you never would have realized on your own.  Awareness is a HUGE part of self-care. You cannot move forward, heal, grow, or learn until you gain an awareness and understanding of yourself…of your past...your traumas...your personality...your SELF.

Allow yourself to meet new people

This doesn’t have anything to do with dating again.  Make new friends.  Not all your friends are going to understand your journey.  Even if they are your biggest supporters, it does not mean they understand or can relate.  Meet people that have gone through a divorce.  Join a support group.  The more people you surround yourself with, the less lonely you will feel, especially in the beginning, when being alone is a new thing.

Take care of your physical self

Even in the “best” of divorces, stress is inevitable.  Stress not only wears on you mentally, but also physically.  Chronic stress can wreak havoc on our bodies, both internally and externally.  It is imperative that you take care of yourself so that you feel your best, look your best, and stay healthy.  This includes healthy eating, regular exercise, yoga, meditation, massages, sunlight, and getting the right vitamins and nutrients.  

De-Clutter your life

Get rid of things that no longer serve you; that remind you of the past; that are keeping you from moving forward; that are causing you stress; or that you simply just need to go through and get rid of.  It’s a proven fact that clutter contributes to higher anxiety.  Clean out closets.  Get rid of pictures/contacts in your phone.  Give your ex everything that belongs to him/her.  Update or just remove the pictures in your home…especially the wedding pictures.

De-Cluttering is all very therapeutic, and you will feel better and more at ease each time you do a little de-cluttering.  

Get your hair done

Or your nails.  Or eyebrows.  Or eyelashes.  Or some botox.  Or all of it.  Buy some new clothes.  Improving your physical appearance will improve your mood and help give you a fresh start.

Ditch your old bedding

This sounds weird but trust me.  If you are in the same house you lived in with your ex, and sleeping in the same bed, change it.  Get a new bed.  Or at least get new bedding.  Rearrange your bedroom.  Paint your room a new color. Redecorate.  Out with the old, in with the new.  That was your old life.  Create a new space…a space that’s just yours.  

Have girls nights 

Being newly single can be exhausting, especially if you have kids.  But you need to remember to make time for yourself.  Stay in our go out.  Have dinner and a glass of wine (or lots of wine!).  Chat.  Vent.  Laugh.  Cry.  It’ll do wonders for the soul.  There’s no better time spent than time with your best friends.

Take a trip

With divorce and a newly single life often comes financial hardships.  So, taking a big vacation to a tropical island might not be in the cards, but try to get away somewhere.  Anywhere.  For a few days, a weekend, or even a night.  Getting away from your current environment, the one that’s currently so full of struggles, stress and emotions, could be just what you need to recharge, reset and rebalance.